10 Steps to Become the Man of Her Dreams

Family & Life Team
20 August, 2021
Make your other half happy and you are at least 50% on the way to a blissful life!

People (especially in movies) act as though being in love is a fate that people don’t have control over. While it’s true that everything is written, life continues to teach us that real love is like a garden that one carefully tends to so that it may grow stronger over time.

It seems like it takes much work and effort to build a strong bond between a husband and wife, but really it’s only necessary to do the right thing(s). The accepted intentions can have the result by the grace of God: a happy marriage.

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Here are 10 things to do in order to be the perfect husband:

1. Be a ‘good guy’
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A good guy is warm, kind, positive, understanding, and friendly to his wife, family, and friends. It’s true that we often hurt ones closest to us, so remember not to. Work at being pleasant towards your wife. She is your other half, the most important person in your life.

Don’t take your bad day home with you. Welcome your wife with a smile when you are reunited at the end of the day. Listen to her, talk about her day, especially if it was a difficult one.

2. Respect is a two-way street
It’s very important for men to be respected. Well guess what? Women want to be respected too, especially by their husband. So always speak to her in a loving way and refrain from speaking in a harsh manner. A good husband respects his wifey. He never chooses to belittle, strike, humiliate, or otherwise harm her in private or in public.

It is better to pause, consider what you want to say and think before speaking. It is not possible to take back the words once they are said. A good husband will treat his woman with respect in front of others and at home, especially in front of his family.

3. Communicate
“Lack of communication” is cited by 65% of divorced couples as the key problem in their marriage. Obviously, communication is something all couples need to work at. Men generally are not as communicative as women, so you may need to really put in the effort here. Be honest. Find time to sit and talk with her on a daily basis, even if it is for only half an hour.

Without communication, it may seem that you are hiding things or keeping secrets from your wife. The wife and the husband are partners; never make any major decisions about the family without consulting your partner, doing so would be disrespectful to your wife.

4. Communicating also means listening
As hard as it may be to express yourself, it’s also important to listen to your wife. You have to truly understand each other to resolve any problems.

Disagreements or problems may happen, but do not let the world know about it. Rather, you should try to solve it between yourselves as partners. Try to move on and stop rehashing the past and reminding her of her faults. Seek outside counselling or advice together if you can’t move past an issue or incident.

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5. Lift her and she lifts you
A wife needs her husband’s support and understanding, especially in crisis times. A husband is a wife’s wali, a “protector” and “helper.” A good husband loves his wife for her successes and failures. He cheers her on, gives well-meaning advice, and provides reassurance when she’s feeling down.

A woman goes through many biological and other stages in her life. It’s important to support her at every level. Ultimately you’ll both succeed. Be proud of her accomplishments and genuinely compliment her.

You can then expect her to behave in return in the same manner and also respect you more for your support and thoughtfulness. If you don’t agree with her, respectfully let her know that in a healthy conversation.

6. Give her space
Your wife is not just your wife. As a husband, it’s important to understand that your wife’s world is not only about you. She has a family, friends, and colleagues who are also part of her life. She may also have hobbies and passions she is involved in.

Don’t expect her undivided attention at all times. Don’t stop her if she wants to go enjoy time with her friends or even go out on her own. A controlling husband can be emotionally damaging.

7. Accept her
One of the problems of women being objectified is that we often think of them in a homogenous sort of way, making sweeping generalizations about women. You may even do this towards your wife. For example, you may assume she likes pink, roses and chocolate, when actually she loves green, succulents and steak!

Only by accepting your wife as the unique individual she is, you are showing her respect and gratitude for her. She has so much to offer you if only you give her the space to be herself.

She is a growing individual, just like you are. Help her grow in the direction that she chooses, and give her the chance to be the person she wants.

8. Express your love and appreciation very often 
Women like to hear the words “I love you” as well as praise about their intentions and successes. Always tell her how much you love her and how blessed you are to be her husband!

Fulfill her emotional and physical needs. Sexual intimacy is one of the most essential things for a happy marriage. She may be shy about it, but you must find out what satisfies her in the bed.

9. Take care of your health and appearance
Remember how good you looked on your wedding day? She does! Give yourself enough time, take care of your health and appearance putting it among your priorities.

Let your wife feel good whenever she looks at you. Let her see the good looking, nice smelling, and neat husband she married all the time.

Help her maintain herself too by giving her the time and resources she needs to do so. Taking care of herself is a big thing that she can’t do without your support.

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10. Maintain the house
Now that you are an adult, you may notice that there are daily chores, seasonal chores and annual chores. Things like repairs and organizing take a lot of work, be sure to make time to do them. The household is not just your wife’s responsibility. Maintain a clean house all the time. Take care of any little details you see needing attending to and ask how you can help

If your wife is a working woman, you may want to hire help to take care of the household chores of cooking, cleaning, and so forth. Outsource as many tasks as you can and need to.