The family in general and the wife in particular is a precious trust and great responsibility that a Muslim must shoulder and never neglect. In this matter, just like in all others, the Prophet, 
, is an example for all husbands in the way he treated and nurtured his wives.
, encouraged people to nurture their families; he, , said: “Allah will ask every person about those under his guardianship. (He will ask) whether he protected and preserved them, or squandered them; (this is) the extent to which He will ask man about his family members.”, do with regard to nurturing his wives? How did he, ,, educate them, enjoin them to do good and forbid them from doing evil? What was his manner and method in talking to them and being kind to them? These questions are answered below., would teach his wives matters pertaining to faith:The Prophet, , would teach his wives matters related to faith and creed and expound to them the oneness of Allah The Almighty and His greatness. He, , would explain the Names and Attributes of Allah to them, as well as matters related to the Hereafter. Once he, , was talking to ‘Aa’ishah, may Allah be pleased with her, about accountability in the Hereafter and said: “He who is questioned will be punished.” `Aa’ishah, may Allah be pleased with her, then asked, “Does Allah not say (what means): {Then as for he who is given his record in his right hand. He will be judged with an easy account}[Quran 84: 7-8]He clarified and this, saying:“This does not mean holding people to account. Rather, it refers to merely presenting to them their records, but the one who will be questioned will certainly be punished.”, would teach his wives supplications and the mention of Allah The Almighty:The Prophet, , also taught his wives designated mentions of Allah The Almighty, such as how to seek refuge in Allah The Almighty from evil, etc. Once, he, , saw the moon and said to ‘Aa’ishah, may Allah be pleased with her: “O ‘Aa’ishah! Seek refuge in Allah from the evil of this, as it is (what is referred to by) 'The evil of darkness when it settles.' (referring to Quran: 113: 3]).”He, , was pointing to the moon, as it is an indicator of the approach of evening, during which many evils can take place., would teach his wives to fear Allah The Almighty:The Prophet, , would run back and forth, in and out of his house, whenever he felt the wind and saw the clouds forming, and signs of disturbance would appear on his face. Once ‘Aa’ishah, may Allah be pleased with her, said to him when he did so, “People rejoice upon seeing the wind (and clouds) while I see you do what you do (i.e., become disturbed).” He, ,responded: “O ‘Aa’ishah! What assurance do I have that it will not be one of punishment? Allah has punished earlier nations with the wind; when these people felt the wind (and saw) the clouds approaching, they said, 'This is a cloud bringing us rain!’”Thus, a Muslim must always fear Allah The Almighty and His punishment., would make his wives accustomed to worship:The Prophet, , would train his wives to wake up at night to perform the voluntary night prayers, by waking them up himself. Moreover, his teaching was not limited to prayer, as he, , instructed ‘Aa’ishah, may Allah be pleased with her, to spend in charity, saying: “Do not hoard, otherwise, Allah will withhold from you.”[Al-Bukhari and Muslim] He, , thereby taught her not to restrict her spending in charity and to be extremely generous. This shows how keen he, , was to instruct his wives in recommended matters and not just regarding mandatory matters or prohibitions.
The Prophet, 
, would teach his wives to guard their tongues:Due to the numerous harms of the tongue, the Muslim husband should instruct his wife and teach her how to guard her tongue and use it appropriately. Two of the most destructive diseases of the tongue which a husband should be especially wary of are backbiting and tale-bearing. The Prophet, , was very keen to protect his wives from any such diseases and would immediately correct them and instruct them in this regard.‘Aa’ishah, may Allah be pleased with her, said, “I said to the Prophet ‘Such and such a matter of Safiyyah is sufficient for you (meaning that she was a woman of short stature).’ He said: ‘You have uttered a statement that would pollute the (entire) sea if it were mixed in it.’”
She, may Allah be pleased with her, further stated, “I once imitated a person in his presence and he said:‘I would never like to imitate anyone, even (if I was paid) such and such an amount (for doing so).’”[Abu Daawood and At-Tirmithi]
· The Prophet, , would teach his wives to control their tongues, even with their enemies:`Aa’ishah, may Allah be pleased with her, said, “A group of non-believers once came to the Messenger of Allah and said, ‘As-Saam 'Alayk (i.e. death (be) upon you).’ He responded, saying: ‘Wa 'Alaykum (i.e. and upon you).’”
`Aa’ishah, may Allah be pleased with her, said, “I said, ‘Death be upon you, and the curse of Allah and His wrath!' He said: ‘O `Aa’ishah! Do not use coarse language.’”
`Aa’ishah, may Allah be pleased with her, said, “O Messenger of Allah! Did you not hear what they said?” He, , said: ‘Did you not hear me replying to them with the same term? Allah does not like the use of coarse language.’[Al-Bukhari]
In spite of the fact that those disbelievers were his enemies, the Prophet, , limited his retaliation to the extent to which he was wronged and did not transgress, otherwise, people would become accustomed to using strong language with one another.
· How the Prophet, , dealt with jealousy:Jealousy is a natural feeling in women, and the Prophet, , dealt with this in a manner that reflected his wisdom and tolerance. Anas, may Allah be pleased with him, reported,
“Once the Prophet was in the room of ‘Aa’ishah, may Allah be pleased her, when another of his wives sent him a plate of food. This enraged ‘Aa’ishah, may Allah be pleased her, who became jealous due to the fact that the food was sent while it was her turn to be with the Prophet . She, may Allah be pleased her, therefore took hold of the plate and threw it, smashing it to pieces. The Prophet then gathered the food and the broken pieces of the plate and said (jokingly): ‘Your mother (i.e. the Mother of the believers) has become jealous.’Then she, may Allah be pleased with her, regretted what she had done and asked him how to expiate for the mistake, so he commanded her to replace the broken plate by sending one of her own to the wife whose plate she had broken.” [Al-Bukhari]
· The Prophet, , would entertain his wives: `Aa’ishah, may Allah be pleased with her, said, “Once I went out with the Messenger of Allah on a journey and after we had travelled for some time, he commanded his Companions to go ahead and leave us behind them. When they were far enough ahead he said to me: ‘Let us race.’So we raced, and I won. A few years later, and after I had put on some weight, he took me along on another journey, and after we had travelled for some time, he commanded his Companions to go ahead and leave us behind them. When they were far enough ahead he said to me: ‘Let us race.’We raced and this time he won, so he said to me:‘This one for that one.’”
His mercy towards women: ‘Aa'ishah may Allah be pleased with her, recounted that Faatimah,may Allah be pleased with her, once came walking in a manner identical to that of the Prophet, . When she arrived, he, , stood up and exclaimed: ‘Welcome, my daughter!’ Then, he seated her at his side and whispered into her ear, and what he had said caused her to cry; then, he whispered to her again, and she laughed. 'Aa'ishah, may Allah be pleased with her, later asked her, “What made you weep and then laugh?” She, may Allah be pleased with her, replied, “I will never expose a secret that the Prophet entrusted me with.” After the death of the Prophet, sallallaahu '‘alayhi wa sallam, 'Aa'ishah, may Allah be pleased with her, asked her the same questions again, so she answered, “First, he informed me that his death was near, so I cried. After that, he told me that I will be the leader of the ladies of Paradise, so I laughed. He also told me: ‘You will be the first of my household who will follow me (die after him).’” [Al-Bukhari and Muslim]
, but in some cases the matter necessitated the mention of some details which he, , was bashful in saying himself, so he would have one of his wives convey it to them instead. Asmaa’ bint Yazeed,may Allah be pleased with her, came to him once and said,, turned to some of the Companions, may Allah be pleased with them, who were present and said: “Did you ever hear a woman asking a better question with regards to her religion than this woman?” Then he, , said to her: “O Asmaa’! Go back to your fellow women and inform them that your kind treatment to your husbands, seeking their satisfaction and happiness, and obeying them equals all (the reward) that you mentioned men attain.” Asmaa’,may Allah be pleased with her, left whilst glorifying Allah The Almighty aloud, as happy as could be due to what she had heard. came to him and asked, “Give me an animal to ride on.” The Prophet, replied: “I will give you the son of a female camel.” She,may Allah be pleased with her, said with astonishment, “What could I do with the son of a she-camel? It would be too small to ride!” Thereupon, the Messenger of Allah said: “I will only give you the son of a female camel.” [Ibn Sa’d]What do female camels deliver except camels i.e., every camel, even when fully grown, is still the offspring of a female camel? He, , was going to give her a fully grown camel, but he was only teasing her., dealt with women the way he did. After all, he was and still is the role-model, the ideal example and the greatest person to be emulated, and he was sent as a mercy to all of humanity
