Allah, The Almighty, has made our parents the cause of our existence and made them the source of providing us with unparalleled love and a sound upbringing. However, when we grow up, we tend to forget the period of our infancy and childhood and disregard their efforts. What ingratitude can be worse than this?
The very least we can do for our parents is to show goodness and kind treatment towards them while they are alive, and supplicate for them, offer charity and other righteous deeds on their behalf after their death.
Allah, The Almighty, mentions the virtues of being good to one’s parents in conjunction with worshipping Him alone when He Says (what means): {“And your Lord has decreed that you worship none but Him. And that you are dutiful to your parents. If one of them or both of them attain old age in your life, say not to them a word of disrespect, nor shout at them but address them in terms of honor. And lower unto them the wing of submission and humility through mercy, and say: `My Lord! Bestow on them Your Mercy as they did bring me up when I was young.'"} [Quran 17: 23-24]
• The Prophet classified being undutiful to parents as one of the great major sins and he mentioned it along with associating partners with Allah, The Almighty, in His worship. He said: "Shall I not inform you about the most grievous of the grave sins?" His Companions replied, "Please do, O Messenger of Allah!" He said: "Associating anything with Allah (in worship), and being undutiful to parents, (he was reclining at that time, then he sat up and said): (beware of) false testimony or false utterance." He repeated it so many times that his Companions wished that he would become silent. [Al-Bukhari and Muslim].
• A man came to the Prophet and asked, "Which of the people is most deserving of my good companionship?" He replied: “It is your mother.” The man asked, "Who is next?" He replied: “It is your mother.” The man then asked, "Who is next?" He again replied: “It is your mother.” Then the man asked, "Who is next?" The Prophet replied: “It is your father.” [Al-Bukhari].
• Abu Hurayrah narrated that the Prophet said: "Let him be humiliated! Let him be humiliated! Let him be humiliated!" It was asked, "Who, O Messenger of Allah?" He replied: “He whose parents reach old age, either one or both of them, and who does not enter Paradise (due to not being dutiful to them).” [Muslim]
• Dutifulness to parents is one of the reasons behind the forgiveness of sins. Ibn ‘Umar, may Allah be pleased with them both, said that a man came to the Prophet and said, "I have committed a great sin, can I repent from it?" The Prophet asked: “Is your mother alive?” ; another narration reads: “Are you parents alive?” The man replied, "No" so the Prophet asked: “Do you have a maternal aunt?” The man replied, "Yes" Thereupon, the Prophet said: “Then be dutiful to her.” [At-Tirmithi].
• ‘Ali ibn Abi Taalib said, "If there was anything less than this expression (i.e., saying 'Uff' to one's parents) as a form of being undutiful, Allah would have forbidden that expression." Allah, The Almighty, also mentions gratefulness to Him along with being grateful to one’s parents when He says (what means): “Give thanks to Me and to your parents. Unto Me is the final destination.” [Quran, 31: 14]
These Ahadeeth inspire you to be dutiful to your parents and respect and glorify them. Do not be negligent of the saying of the Prophet : “The pleasure of the Lord is in pleasing your parents, and the wrath of the Lord (upon the child) is in making your parents angry.” [At-Tabaraani].
Allah The Almighty Says (what means): {And Allah has made for you from your homes a place of rest.}[Quran 16:80]
You have told the truth, O our Lord! The home is a place of rest, stability, comfort, reassurance, safety and tranquility, in which we live, and with which we protect ourselves from the heat of summer and the cold of winter. It is also our shelter in which we take refuge after the trouble and toil of the day.
If a little bird's nest is its shelter, place of rest and abode of reassurance, it would be more worthy for man to have his home an abode of happiness and a source of his pleasure. A home is not only walls, furniture and linen, but it is also a place of worship, an institute, and a place for cordiality and comfort. The spouses fill it with love and affection, and tranquility, calmness and stability shade it.
In the Muslim home, material and sensual rest is combined with spiritual and emotional rest; thereby the home is comprehensive and balanced. Also, Allah The Almighty has made the home a place of rest for the couple; He has made the husband a source of tranquility for his wife, and the wife a source of tranquility for her husband. Allah The Almighty Says (what means): {And of His signs is that He created for you from yourselves mates that you may find tranquility in them; and He placed between you affection and mercy. Indeed in that are signs for a people who give thought.} [Quran 30:21] Thus, marriage is a source of tranquility, and homes are places of rest – a favor from Allah The Almighty which should be appreciated, maintained and preserved.
Some of us might wonder: “Why a Muslim home? Is there a difference between a Muslim and a non-Muslim home?”
Undoubtedly, the Muslim home differs from any other. Its inhabitants carry in their chests a glorious belief which fills their hearts with the light of faith, and this light is reflected on all aspects of their life. A Muslim person should be (an example of the) Quran among people, the same as was the moral character of the Messenger of Allah, . For this reason, a Muslim home, with its corners, furniture, and the way it is arranged, should express the Islam of its owner.
The Muslim home might be a simple hut, or a graceful palace, and in either there is pleasure, gratitude, satisfaction and living in the shades of the Noble Quran and Sunnah. The family members are happy, not because they have great furniture or expensive fittings, but because happiness springs from their believing hearts and reassured souls. This is because they are pleased with Allah The Almighty as their Lord, Islam as their religion and Muhammad, , as their Prophet and Messenger.
The houses of the Prophet, , were a good pattern for an Islamic home. As small in size and modest in building as they might have been, they were full of happiness and satisfaction, and remained the highest ideal for the homes of the Companions, may Allah be pleased with them, and any of the Muslims who wished to lay the foundation of a home afterwards.
The houses of the Prophet, , were established on obedience and seeking the satisfaction of Allah The Almighty, thereby representing the best example of the real Islamic home. Allah The Almighty Says (what means): {Then is one who laid the foundation of his building on righteousness [with fear] from Allah and [seeking] His approval better or one who laid the foundation of his building on the edge of a bank about to collapse, so it collapsed with him into the fire of Hell? And Allah does not guide the wrongdoing people.} [Quran 9:109]
Although the houses of the Prophet, , were as humble, only enough as to satisfy his need, as simple as to cover (the minimum requirements of) his living, they were full of happiness, where their inhabitants were well-pleased with the fate and sustenance endowed to them by Allah The Almighty, and believing in the statement of the Prophet, : “He, upon whom morning comes while being safe and sound, healthy in his body, and having the sustenance of his day, seems as if the entire world has been granted for him.” [At-Tirmithi and Ibn Maajah]
The houses of the Prophet, , were based on worship and obedience to Allah The Almighty, where humbleness, simplicity and abstinence from the enjoyment of this worldly life seemed evident. All his houses surrounded the mosque. Some of them were built of palm reeds covered with mud, others of stones piled on top of each other, having their ceiling made of palm reeds.
The home of the Mother of Believers, ‘Aa‘ishah, may Allah be pleased with her, the dearest of his wives to him after Khadeejah, may Allah be pleased with her, consisted of one chamber, built of bricks covered with mud, and another room annexed to it, made of palm reeds, covered with animal hair. Its door had a single wooden post, and its ceiling was low, like all the other houses of the Prophet, . It had simple furniture: a bed of pieces of wood tied with fiber ropes, having a cushion of leather stuffed with fiber; a water-skin; and clay vessels for his food and ablution.
Simplicity and contentment also seemed evident in the homes of the Companions of the Messenger of Allah, . The furniture of Faatimah, may Allah be pleased with her, the daughter of the Prophet, , with which she was wed to ‘Ali Ibn Abi Taalib, may Allah be pleased with him, consisted of a mantle of velvet, a cushion of leather stuffed with fiber, a millstone, a water-skin and two jars. That was the furniture of the leader of the women of Paradise, and the daughter of the master of all the prophets, may Allah exalt their mention. This shows how the houses of the Prophet, , and of his Companions, may Allah be pleased with them, were a good model for the Islamic home.
If such was the state of the houses of the Prophet, , and his Companions, may Allah be pleased with them, this does not mean that Islam impedes one from being blessed in a graceful spacious home; on the contrary, according to Islam, that is a sustenance, favor and grace bestowed by Allah The Almighty upon whomever He pleases. Allah The Almighty Says (what means): {Say, “Who has forbidden the adornment of Allah which He has produced for His servants and the good [lawful] things of provision?”} [Quran 7:32] The Messenger of Allah, , said: “Four things bring about happiness: a righteous woman (i.e., wife), a spacious residence, a good neighbor, and a comfortable means of transport.” [Al-Haakim] Man then has to utilize this pleasure in all that is good, for he would be held accountable about it on the Day of Judgment as confirmed by Allah The Almighty in the verse (which means): {Then you will surely be asked that Day about pleasure.} [Quran 102:8]
Like other human beings, the Muslim family inclines to possess the best, the most spacious, the prettiest, and the richest of homes. Allah The Almighty Says (what means): {Beautified for people is the love of that which they desire - of women and sons, heaped-up sums of gold and silver, fine branded horses, and cattle and tilled land. That is the enjoyment of worldly life, but Allah has with Him the best return.} [Quran 3:14]
The Muslim family knows well that real happiness is to make the home, whether it is small or large, a garden full of faith, satisfied with contentment, shaded with tranquility and reassurance; and to have its members adopt high morals and upright conduct. It perceives that in whichever state it might be, it is living in a favor bestowed by Allah The Almighty for which gratitude is due. Gratitude for a favor develops, purifies and proliferates it as confirmed by Allah; Allah The Almighty (what means): {If you are grateful, I will surely increase you [in favor].} [Quran 14:7]
The Muslim family neither boasts nor shows pride over others because of the favors of Allah The Almighty bestowed upon it. It always shows the bounty and favor conferred by Allah The Almighty upon it in response to His statement (which means): {But as for the favor of your Lord, report [it].} [Quran 93:11] And, acting upon the statement of the Messenger of Allah, : “Indeed, Allah likes to see the signs of His favor on His slave.” [At-Tirmithi and Al-Haakim]
But, at the same time, the Muslim family should not engage in worldly pleasures and neglect obedience to Allah The Almighty, nor be mainly concerned with their house in this worldly life, which diverts them from working for their house in Paradise, Allah willing. To this meaning a poet refers, by saying that one shall have no abode to reside in after death other than the one he built before his death. If he built it well, his residence (in the Hereafter) would be good; and if he built it with evil, he would fail.
Once, ‘Ali Ibn Abi Taalib, may Allah be pleased with him, passed by a man who was building a house, thereupon he said to him, “You were dead before you came to life, and in a short while you will be dead [yet again]. You are building a house for the perishing abode [i.e. this worldly life], so build a house for the eternal abode [i.e. the Hereafter as well].”
Blessed be the Muslim family if it is to have the world in its hand and not in its heart; and blessed be it if it is to utilize all things surrounding it correctly in such a way as to help it obey Allah The Almighty, acting upon the following wisdom, “Work for your worldly life as if you would live forever, and work for your Hereafter as if you would die tomorrow.” [Ibn Al-Mubaarak in Az-Zuhd]
To talk about the Muslim home, its components and furniture, does not mean that all those specifications should be comprised in every home. But, it is an ideal we ask Allah The Almighty to give to every Muslim on the face of the earth.
The main point lies not in the walls and furniture of the house so much as it lies in its inhabitants. Hence, every family member could bring about happiness and satisfaction to his household with the smallest thing available to him. The faithful believer is intelligent and prudent, as the Messenger of Allah, , said: “The sagacious one is he who holds himself accountable [for his deeds], and works for [the life] after death; and the incompetent is he who subjugates his self to its fancies and has hopeful expectations from Allah.”[Ahmad, At-Tirmithi and Ibn Maajah]
