Perhaps the title of this article astonishes you, and attracts your sight and attention, and maybe you are now thinking about that unknown child, or, let us say, the child who is unknown not only to you but to many other parents.

A pious God-conscious child! Is it possible that such a child actually exists?

Perhaps, dear parent, you need of a book of Tafseer (exegesis) to explain to you the concept of the term pious God-conscious. However, let me spare you that effort.

Pious God-consciousness stands for the pious who have sound understanding of the religion and the devout scholars of the Lord. It is mentioned in that meaning in Surat Al ‘Imran, where Allah The Almighty Says (what means): {…"Be pious scholars of the Lord because of what you have taught of the Scripture and because of what you have studied."} [Quran 3:79]

Pious God-consciousness also stands for the pious worshipper and religious scholar as stated in Surat Al-Ma’idah where Allah The Almighty Says (what means): {Why do the rabbis and religious scholars not forbid them?...} [Quran 5:63]

Pious God-consciousness then combines three concepts: understanding of the religion, religious knowledge and worship -- or at least two: knowledge and acting upon that knowledge.

The pious God-conscious person is the one who has knowledge about Allah The Almighty, and acts upon that knowledge. That is because knowledge always calls for action: if it responds to the call, that is good, otherwise, it leaves.

The following question then arises: Is there a child who has such attributes?

I mean a child who is a pious God-conscious worshipper in his disposition, who fears the punishment of Allah The Almighty, aspires to attain the good pleasure of Allah, is attached to the Hereafter, eager to learn religious knowledge, eager to pray (in congregation) in the Masjid, eager to memorize and learn the Quran, weeps for fear of Allah The Almighty, takes part with the old in the I‘tikaaf (seclusion in the Masjid) of Ramadan, observes (the Commandments of) Allah in secret and in public, rises above all vices and shameful deeds, refrains from what is unfavorable but instead endeavors to do what is favorable, is dutiful to his parents and maintains his kinship ties.

All those faith-boosting characteristics are combined in one term: God-consciousness and piety.

Dear parent, perhaps you are now thinking about the children of these days, I mean the children of the internet and video games, the children who abandon the prayer and raise their voices against their parents, and who may even beat their parents, we seek refuge with Allah The Almighty.

Nay! It is not about those that I am talking to you, given that my aim by this talk is to mend their affairs, and make them fit to carry that supreme noble attribute, i.e., to be pious and God-conscious.

However, in this meeting, let me enjoy with you an exploration of god-consciousness and piety, and scoop some of its pure and sweet spring, and tour with brilliant examples from the childhood of the pious God-conscious children, so that we attain the purpose of this article, i.e. realizing that the pious God-conscious child is real; not imaginary, and can possibly exist.

The first model

The pious God-conscious worshipping child is he who relies on Allah The Almighty:

One of the Companions entered a mosque and his eye fell on a child of no more than eleven years, who was standing in prayer submissively. When he finished his prayer, he asked him,

"Who is your father, boy?" The child said, "I am an orphan." He asked him, "Then, do you accept to be a son of mine?" The child said, "Then, would you feed me whenever I am hungry?"

The Companion answered in the affirmative. The child further asked, "Then, would you give me water whenever I am thirsty?" The Companion answered in the affirmative. He asked him,

"Then, would you dress me whenever I am naked?" He answered in the affirmative. He asked him, "Then, would you bring me to life when I die?" The Companion was astonished and said, "There is no way to do so."

On that the child said, "Then, leave me to Him who has created me, and it is He who sustains me, then will cause me to die and then bring me to life once again."

The noble Companion left while saying, "By my life, whoever relies on Allah The Almighty, He is sufficient for him."

Similarly, there is among the pious God-conscious worshippers, those who rely on Allah The Almighty as He should be relied upon.

The second model

The pious God-conscious worshipping child stands at night (in prayer):

It was narrated that when Abu Yazid Tayfur ibn ‘Isa Al-Bistami  learnt the Statement of Allah (what means): {O you who wraps himself [in clothing], Arise [to pray] the night, except for a little.} [Quran 73:1-2], he asked his father, "O father! Who is the one whom Allah The Almighty is addressing here?" He said, "O son! That is Prophet Muhammad ." He asked. "O father! Why do you not do the same as the Prophet Muhammad  did?" He said, "O son! Allah The Almighty Favored His Prophet  by making obligatory the standing at night (in prayer) on him apart from his Ummah." On that the child kept silent.

However, when the child learnt the Saying of Allah (what means): {Indeed, your Lord Knows, [O Muhammad], that you stand [in prayer] almost two thirds of the night or half of it or a third of it, and [so do] a group of those with you…} [Quran 73:20], the child asked his father, "O father! I have learnt that a group of people stood at night (in prayer) with the Prophet : who are they?" His father said, "Those are the Companions ." The child asked, "Then, why do you leave what was done by the Companions?" He said, "You are right my son. I will never leave it Allah willing." From this time on, he kept standing at night in prayer. One night, Abu Yazid  got up and behold! His father was praying. He said to him, "Teach me how to get purified, perform ablution and do like your doing and pray with you." His father said to him, "O son! Sleep, for you are still young." He said, "O father! Then, when it is the day on which the people will depart separated [into categories] to be shown [the result of] their deeds, I will say to my Lord: "I said to my father: "How should I get purified and perform ablution to pray with you", and he refused and said to me, 'Sleep for you are still young.'" On that his father said to him, "No, by Allah, son!" he taught him and he offered prayer with him.

From among these examples of pious children, there is such a child who reflects on Allah The Almighty, and the dominion of Allah The Almighty.

The last example

The pious God-conscious worshipping girl:

Hatim Al-Asamm  had many children whom he addressed saying, "I intend to perform Hajj this year." They wept and said, "To whom are you going to entrust us our father?" One of his daughters said, "Stop weeping and let our father perform Hajj. No doubt, it is not he who provides for sustenance, (and recited what means): {Indeed, it is Allah who is the [continual] Provider, the Firm Possessor of Strength.} [Quran 51:58]

The children slept and they were in a state of hunger, and went on blaming their sister (for her approach), who said (supplicating), "O Allah! Disappoint me not among them!"

It happened that the governor of the town came upon that place and asked for water, and one of them gave him a new container of cold water. When the governor drank he asked him,

"Whose house is this?" He said, "The house of Hatim Al-Asamm." He threw a piece of gold and said to his companions (who were with him), "Whoever likes me should do the same." They all threw (pieces of gold) like him.

The daughter of Hatim Al-Asamm wept so her mother asked her, "What causes you to weep, given that Allah The Almighty has enlarged sustenance upon us?" She said, "O mother! A creature has looked at us (with mercy and kindness and provided for us) and so we have become independent and grateful: then, what do you think if Allah The Almighty looks at us (with mercy and kindness)?”

Dear parent, these are some brilliant examples, and it is possible that we could elevate our children to this high level.

 

Question

Assalamu alaykum.

I am having marriage issues because of the interference of my in-laws and I wonder how to deal with this. I am from the UK, my husband is from abroad and feels obligated to keep sending money to his family who are extremely wealthy already. The grandfather, who owns many properties in the UK, also sends them money for the maintenance of their vast lands and home. My husband and I owe money to his grandfather and my parents, who helped towards a deposit for our house in the UK; due to the financial struggle, we have not given one penny back in four years. The in-laws keep asking for more money as well as for items which can easily be found in their country for a fraction of the price that they cost here. We even had our mother-in-law over as a visitor because she wanted to meet her grandson and could not wait for us to bring him to them. Despite our financial situation, she demanded it.


Many things have happened since she came to UK, she badmouths people, invited non-mahrams (permanently unmarriageable people) to my house to chat with them, and sometimes even made me leave my own house when they would come. She lies and does not treat people kindly. I never told any of this to my husband or to his grandfather. I kept silent out of love and respect.

It has now come to my attention that my mother-in-law has been telling my husband's grandfather (her father-in-law) that I did not treat her right or disobeyed her. He told my parents about that, and now I feel trapped. I cannot speak up, fearing the consequences, for my husband can be a violent man.


It feels like my in-laws have a right to control every aspect of my and my husband's life; my husband does not treat me with kindness. If I ask him to help me with something, he has to question why. I am expecting his second child now and eight months pregnant; I should not extert myself in preparing our son's bedroom. He would rather spend his day off sleeping or going to see his friends. His sister has announced that she wants to name the new baby without my consent. I feel so trapped and alone.

Answer

May Allah make it easy for you; life is challenging and full of tests, and people are tested differently. Allah is the Most Wise; therefore, He would test His slaves with matters of ease and matters of difficulty to see who is grateful and who is patient. Humans are a test to one another. To overcome these types of tests, we need a mixture of knowledge and action.


Here is some of the advice that I would like to offer:

1- Make sure that you are not looking at your situation with an extreme view; sometimes we might exaggerate our feelings, which leads us to not being able to see things from a just point of view. Give the benefit of the doubt and try to find excuses for others. I know that this might sound a bit harsh, I am not accusing you but am rather trying to help you purify your heart from any ill feelings towards those who harm you and disturb you.

2- Wish good for your in-laws and supplicate that Allah guide them and help them.

3- If you have been wrongly accused by your mother in-law, then be patient and Allah will make things better for you. Treat her well and try to speak to your husband in a kind way about the situation.

4- Seek rewards from Allah by waiting for the rewards in this life and the Hereafter. Life is a test, and everyone is tested accordingly; Allah is the Most Wise. Some people are tested with a lack of wealth, a lack of health, etc., and some people are tested by other human beings in their lives, so your in laws are a test for you.

5- Never approve of haram; if your in-laws indulge in it, then you should be away and distance yourself.

6- Increase your worship and prayers at night, it gives strength in every-day issues like that.

7- If your in-laws’ visit is temporary, then it will be easy. If they stay for good, then you have the right to be independent, but without disputes that can lead to problems in the family.


May Allah make it easy for you and bless your family and give you patience.