The hadeeth was also narrated by al-Daarimi, may Allaah have mercy on him,
from Jaabir, who said that ‘Umar ibn al-Khattaab came to the Messenger of
Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) with a copy of the Tawraat
(Torah), and said, “O Messenger of Allaah, this is a copy of the Tawraat.” [The
Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him)] did not say anything.
[‘Umar] began to read it, and the face of the Messenger of Allaah changed
[i.e., he was angry]. Abu Bakr said, “May your mother lose you! Do you not
see the expression of the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah
be upon him)?” ‘Umar looked at the face of the Messenger of Allaah (peace
and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and said, “I seek refuge with Allaah from
the anger of Allaah and the anger of His Messenger (peace and blessings of
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The Prophet’s Methods for Correcting People’s Mistakes
Allaah be upon him). We are content with Allaah as our Lord, with Islam as
our religion and with Muhammad as our Prophet.” The Messenger of Allaah
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said,
“By the One in Whose hand is the soul of Muhammad, if Moosa were to
appear among you and you followed him and left me, you would go astray
from the straight path. If he had lived until the time of my Prophethood, he
would have followed me.” (Sunan al-Daarimi, no. 441, al-Muqaddimah, Baab
maa yutaqqaa min Tafseer Hadeeth al-Nabi (peace and blessings of Allaah be
upon him) wa Qawli ghayrihi ‘inda Qawlihi (peace and blessings of Allaah be
upon him). The editor, ‘Abd-Allaah Haashim Yamaani, said: it was also narrated
by Ahmad with a hasan isnaad, and by Ibn Hibbaan with a saheeh isnaad).
Among the corroborating reports is the hadeeth of Abu’l-Darda’, who said: “
‘Umar brought some pages of the Tawraat to the Messenger of Allaah (peace
and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and said, ‘O Messenger of Allaah, (these
are) some pages of the Tawraat which I took from a brother of mine from
Bani Zurayq.’ The face of the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of
Allaah be upon him) changed, and ‘Abd-Allaah ibn Zayd – the one who was
shown the Adhaan in a dream – said: ‘Have you gone mad? Do you not see
[the expression] on the face of the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings
of Allaah be upon him)?’ ‘Umar said: ‘We are content with Allaah as our Lord,
with Islam as our religion, with Muhammad as our Prophet and with the
Qur`aan as our guide. The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah
be upon him) relaxed and said:
‘By the One in Whose hand is the soul of Muhammad, if Moosa were among
you, and you followed him and left me, you would go far astray. You are my
share among the nations and I am your share among the Prophets.’” (Al
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The Prophet’s Methods for Correcting People’s Mistakes
Haythami said in al-Majma’: It was reported by al-Tabaraani in al-Kabeer, and
it includes Abu ‘Aamir al-Qaasim ibn Muhammad al-Asadi, and I have not seen
anyone giving his biography, but the rest of its men are mawthooq. Al-Majma’
1174/).
We may note from these reports that the educator (the Prophet (peace and
blessings of Allaah be upon him)) had support from the other people present
when they noticed how his expression changed and took their stance based
on what they saw. There is no doubt that this combination of events had a
great impact on the person who was being reprimanded.
The process went through the following stages:
Firstly,
The anger that welled up in the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be
upon him), so that his expression changed even before he spoke.
Secondly,
[Abu Bakr] al-Siddeeq and ‘Abd-Allaah ibn Zayd noticed this and pointed it
out to ‘Umar.
Thirdly,
‘Umar realized his mistake and hastened to put it right and to apologize for
what he had done, seeking refuge with Allaah from the anger of Allaah and the
anger of His Messenger, and reaffirming the basic principle of being content
with Allaah, His Messenger and His Religion.
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The Prophet’s Methods for Correcting People’s Mistakes
Fourthly,
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) relaxed and calmed
down when ‘Umar retracted and realized his mistake.
Fifthly, the Prophet’s comment confirmed and reinforced this basic principle
by reaffirming the obligation to follow the way of the Prophet (peace and
blessings of Allaah be upon him) and warning against taking any other source
of guidance.
Another example of the Prophet’s anger when he saw something objectionable
was reported in Saheeh al-Bukhaari (may Allaah have mercy on him) from
Anas ibn Maalik, who said that when the Prophet (peace and blessings of
Allaah be upon him) saw some spittle in the mosque in the direction of the
qiblah, he was so upset that it was clearly visible on his face. He wiped it with
his hand and said,
“When one of you gets up to pray, he is talking to his Lord, or his Lord is
between him and the qiblah, so he should not spit in the direction of the
qiblah, but to his left or under his feet.” Then he took the edge of his garment,
spat on it and rubbed part of it against another part and said, “or he can do
this.” (Fath, 405).
An example of the Prophet’s anger when he heard a mistake that led to
wrongdoing was also reported by al-Bukhaari, from Abu Mas‘ood al-Ansaari,
who said: “A man came to the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of
Allaah be upon him) and said, ‘O Messenger of Allaah, I am going to go late to
the prayer tomorrow because of so-and-so, who makes the prayer too long
for us.’ I never saw the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him)
more angry in his rebuking than on that day, when he said,
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The Prophet’s Methods for Correcting People’s Mistakes
‘O people! Some of you are putting others off. When any of you leads the
people in prayer, let him keep it short, for among them are the elderly, the
weak and those with pressing needs.’” (Fath, 7159).
Another example is for the mufti to show anger towards the person who is
asking questions when he starts to nit-pick in a ridiculous fashion. Zayd ibn
Khaalid al-Juhani (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: “A Bedouin came to
the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and asked him about
lost property that he finds. He said,
‘Announce it for a year. Remember the description of its container and the
string with which it is tied, and if someone comes and claims it, and describes
it correctly, give it to him, otherwise, utilize it.’ He said, ‘O Messenger of
Allaah, what about a lost sheep?’ The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah
be upon him) said: ‘It is for you, for your brother (i.e., its owner), or for the
wolf.’ He said, ‘What about a lost camel?’ The face of the Prophet (peace and
blessings of Allaah be upon him) became red (with anger), and he said, ‘You
have nothing to do with it. It has its feet, and access to water, and can eat
trees.’” (Reported by al-Bukhaari, Fath, 2436).
The educator may show anger in proportion to the mistake at the time when
the mistake is made, or when he sees or hears it, in such a way that the anger
may be seen in his face or recognized from his tone of voice. This is a sign that
his heart is alert to wrongdoing and will not keep silent about it, so that the
others present will feel afraid of making the same mistake. Speaking out when
you are angry can have a greater impact than remaining silent and waiting until
things have cooled down, because then the impact of your comments will be
lost.
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The Prophet’s Methods for Correcting People’s Mistakes
On the other hand, it may be wise to delay commenting on a regrettable
incident or seriously mistaken words until all the people have been called
together or until a time when they meet, because of the seriousness of what
is involved or because there are not enough people around to understand and
convey the information to others. There is nothing wrong with addressing
an individual immediately and delaying general discussion of the matter until
later. According to Saheeh al-Bukhaari, Abu Humayd al-Saa’idi reported that
the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) appointed
someone (to collect the zakaah). When he had finished his work, he came
and said,
“O Messenger of Allaah, this is for you, and this is what was given to me as
a gift.” He said, “Why don’t you sit in your parents’ house and see whether
anyone brings you a gift or not?” In the evening, the Messenger of Allaah (peace
and blessings of Allaah be upon him) stood up after the prayer, pronounced
the Shahaadah and praised Allaah as He deserves to be praised, then he said,
“What is wrong with an employee whom we appoint, then he comes to us
and says, ‘This is for you and this is what I was given as a gift”? Why does he
not sit in his parents’ house and see whether anyone brings him a gift or not?
By the One in Whose hand is the soul of Muhammad, no one of you unlawfully
withholds something from us, except he will come on the Day of Judgement
carrying it around his neck: if it is a camel, he will bring it bellowing, if it is a
cow he will bring it mooing, and if it is a sheep he will bring it bleating. I have
conveyed (the message).” Abu Humayd added, “Then the Messenger of Allaah
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) raised his arm so high that we
could see his armpit.” (Fath, 6636)
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The Prophet’s Methods for Correcting People’s Mistakes
Turning Away from the One who has Made a Mistake,
and Avoiding Argumenting him to Make him Come
Back to the Right Way
Al-Bukhaari (may Allaah have mercy on him) reported that ‘Ali ibn Abi Taalib
(may Allaah be pleased with him) said that the Messenger of Allaah (peace and
blessings of Allaah be upon him) came to him and Faatimah’s (peace be upon
her, the daughter of the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be
upon him) one night and said to them,
“Are you not praying?” ‘Ali said, “O Messenger of Allaah, our souls are in the
hand of Allaah. If He wants to bring us back to life (from sleep), He will do
so!” The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him)
went away when ‘Ali said that to him, and he did not respond to it at all, but
‘Ali heard him as he was walking away, slapping his thigh and saying, “ ‘… But,
man is ever more quarrelsome than anything.’ [al-Kahf 18:54 – interpretation
of the meaning].” (The words of ‘Ali could be understood in different ways.
See al-Fath, 7347).
Rebuking the One who has Made a Mistake
This is what the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) did with
Haatib (may Allaah be pleased with him) when he heard that he had sent word
to the kuffaar of Quraysh, informing them of the Muslims’ intention to head
for Makkah to conquer it. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon
him) asked him,
“What made you do that, O Haatib?” He said, “I believe in Allaah and His
Messenger and I never changed, but I wanted to make some gesture towards
them through which Allaah might protect my family and my wealth. All your
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The Prophet’s Methods for Correcting People’s Mistakes
other companions have someone there through whom Allaah will protect
their families and their wealth.” [The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah
be upon him)] said: “He has spoken the truth, so do not say anything but
good to him.” ‘Umar ibn al-Khattaab said, “But he has betrayed Allaah and
Messenger and the believers! Let me strike his neck [cut off his head]!” [The
Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) ] said: “How do you
know? Maybe Allaah looked at the people of Badr and said, ‘Do what you like,
for Paradise is guaranteed for you.’” Tears welled up in ‘Umar’s eyes and he
said, “Allaah and His Messenger know best.” (Fath, 6259)
There are a number of important educational points we
learn from this story:
1.The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) rebuked the Sahaabi
who had make a serious mistake by asking him, “What made you do that?”
2. Enquiring as to the reason that motivated him to make the mistake
undoubtedly has an effect on the way in which he is treated.
3 . Those who have an excellent track record are not immune from committing
major sins.
4. The educator must be open-minded in dealing with his companions’
mistakes so that they continue progressing on the straight path. The aim is to
reform them, not alienate them.
5 . The educator must appreciate the moments of human weakness that may
overcome some of those who are with him, and he should not be shocked by
a serious mistake on the part of one who is advanced or senior.
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The Prophet’s Methods for Correcting People’s Mistakes
6 . Defending one who deserves to be defended even though he has made a
mistake.
7 . If a person who makes a mistake has a great deal of good works to his
credit, this should be taken into account when evaluating the level of his
mistake and dealing with it.
Blaming the Person who has Made a Mistake
An obvious mistake cannot be ignored; blame must be directed at the person
who has made the mistake, and he must be rebuked from the outset, so that
he will realize that he has made a mistake. Al-Bukhaari narrated in his Saheeh
that ‘Ali (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: “I had a she-camel from my
share of the booty of Badr, and the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah
be upon him) had given me another she-camel from the khumus. When I
wanted to marry Faatimah, the daughter of the Messenger of Allaah (peace
and blessings of Allaah be upon him), I made an appointment with a goldsmith
from Banu Qaynuqaa’ to go with me to Idhkhur. I wanted to sell him the two
gold bracelets and use the money for my waleemah (wedding celebration).
Whilst I was gathering together the saddles, sacks, ropes and other gear, my
camels were sitting beside a room belonging to one of the Ansaar. After
collecting the things I had to collect, I came back and found my camels with
their backs cut open, their sides stabbed and their livers removed. I could
hardly bear to look at this scene. I said, ‘Who did this?’ They said, ‘Hamzah
ibn ‘Abd al-Muttalib. He is in that house drinking with one of the Ansaar.’ I
went to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), and Zayd ibn
Haarithah was with him. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon
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The Prophet’s Methods for Correcting People’s Mistakes
him) knew something was wrong from my expression. The Prophet (peace
and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said:
‘What is the matter with you?’ I said, ‘O Messenger of Allaah, I have never seen
anything like today! Hamzah attacked my two she-camels and cut their backs
open and stabbed them in their sides. He is in a house, drinking.’ The Prophet
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) called for his cloak and put it on,
then he went walking, and Zayd ibn Haarithah and I followed him, until he
reached the house where Hamzah was. He asked permission to enter, and
they gave permission. They were drinking, and the Messenger of Allaah (peace
and blessings of Allaah be upon him) started to hurl blame at Hamzah for
what he had done, but then he noticed that Hamzah was drunk and red-eyed.
Hamzah looked at the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be
upon him). He looked up at his knees, then at his navel, then at his face, then
he said, ‘You are no more than a slave to my father.’ The Messenger of Allaah
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) realized that he was drunk, so he
turned on his heels and we went out with him.” (Fath, no. 3091).
This happened before drinking alcohol was forbidden.
Shunning the One who has Made a Mistake
Imaam Ahmad (may Allaah have mercy on him) reported that Humayd said:
“Al-Waleed came to me and a friend of mine and said, ‘Come with me, for
you are younger than me and you know more about hadeeth.’ He took us
to Bishr ibn ‘Aasim. Abu’l-‘Aaliyah said to him: ‘Will you tell these two your
hadeeth?’ He said, ‘‘Uqbah ibn Maalik told us, Abu’l-Nadr al-Laythi said, Bahz,
who was one of his group, said: the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings
of Allaah be upon him) sent an expedition to attack some people. A man
drifted away from the people, and one of the (Muslim) expedition followed
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The Prophet’s Methods for Correcting People’s Mistakes
him with his sword unsheathed. The man who had wandered off said, “I am a
Muslim,” but the Muslim paid no attention to him, and struck him and killed
him. Word of this reached the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of
Allaah be upon him), and he spoke out angrily against it. News of this reached
the killer, and whilst the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be
upon him) was delivering a speech, the killer said, “O Messenger of Allaah, by
Allaah he only said that to protect himself.” The Prophet (peace and blessings
of Allaah be upon him) turned away from him and the people around him, and
continued with his speech. The man said again, “O Messenger of Allaah, he
only said that to protect himself.” The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah
be upon him) again turned away from him and the people around him, and
continued with his speech. The man did not put up with that; a third time he
said, “O Messenger of Allaah, by Allaah he only said that to protect himself.”
The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) turned
to him, and it was clear from his expression how upset he was. He said,
“Allaah scorns the one who kills a believer.” three times.’” (al-Musnad, 5289/.
See also al-Silsilat al-Saheehah, 2309/)
Al-Nisaa`i (may Allaah have mercy on him) reported from Abu Sa‘eed al-
Khudri that a man came from Najraan to the Messenger of Allaah (peace
and blessings of Allaah be upon him), wearing a ring of gold. The Messenger
of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) turned away from him
and said,
“You have come to me with an ember from the Fire of Hell in your hand.”
(Al-Mujtaba, 8170/; Saheeh Sunan al-Nisaa`i, 4793).
Ahmad reported a more detailed version of this from Abu Sa‘eed al-Khudri:
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The Prophet’s Methods for Correcting People’s Mistakes
a man came from Najraan to the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of
Allaah be upon him) wearing a ring of gold. The Messenger of Allaah (peace
and blessings of Allaah be upon him) turned away from him and did not ask
him about anything. The man went back to his wife and told her about it. She
said, “There has to be a reason for that. Go back to the Messenger of Allaah
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him).” So he went back, and threw
away his ring and the garment he was wearing. When he asked permission
to enter, it was given to him. He greeted the Messenger of Allaah (peace and
blessings of Allaah be upon him), who returned the greeting. He said, “O
Messenger of Allaah, you turned away from me when I came before.” The
Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said:
“You came to me with a coal from the fire of Hell in your hand.” He said, “O
Messenger of Allaah, I came with a lot of coals.” He had brought some suits of
clothing from Bahrain. The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah
be upon him) said: “What you have brought is not going to help us in any way
(with regard to the Hereafter). It is no more use than the rocks of al-Harrah,
but they are luxuries of this world.” The man said: “I said, ‘O Messenger
of Allaah, explain this to your Companions, so that they do not think you
were angry with me for some reason.” The Messenger of Allaah (peace and
blessings of Allaah be upon him) stood up and explained this, and said that the
problem had been with his gold ring.” (al-Musnad, 314/).
According to a report narrated by Ahmad (may Allaah have mercy on him)
from ‘Amr ibn Shu’ayb from his father from his grandfather, the Prophet (peace
and blessings of Allaah be upon him) saw one of his Companions wearing a
ring of gold, and turned away from him. The Sahaabi threw it away and put on
a ring of iron, and [the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him)]
said,
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The Prophet’s Methods for Correcting People’s Mistakes
“This is evil, this is the jewellery of the people of Hell,” so he threw it away
and put on a ring of silver, and the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be
upon him) said nothing. (al-Musnad, 163. Al-Musnad edited by Ahmad Shaakir,
no. 6518. He said its isnaad is saheeh).
Boycotting the one who has Made a Mistake
This is one of the effective methods used by the Prophet (peace and
blessings of Allaah be upon him) especially when a very serious mistake was
made, because of the far-reaching effect that a boycott has on the person
concerned. An example of this is what happened to Ka’b ibn Maalik and his
two companions who stayed behind from the campaign of Tabook. After the
Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) had ascertained that they
had no valid excuse, and they had admitted it, as Ka’b said:
“The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) forbade
the Muslims to speak to any of the three of us who had stayed behind. So
the people avoided us and their attitude towards us changed so that even
the earth I was walking on looked different to what I had known. We stayed
like that for fifty days. As for my two companions, they resigned themselves
and stayed in their homes, weeping, but I was the youngest and the most
determined, so I used to go out and attend the prayers with the Muslims and
go around in the market places, and no one would speak to me. I would come
to the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) whilst
he was in a gathering after prayer, and greet him with salaam, asking myself
whether he had moved his lips in response or not. I would pray near him,
stealing glances at him. When I would turn to pray, he would turn towards
me, and when I would turn towards him, he would turn away from me. When
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The Prophet’s Methods for Correcting People’s Mistakes
the people’s harshness had gone on too long for me, I went away and climbed
over the wall of the garden of Abu Qutaadah, who was my cousin [son of my
paternal uncle] and the dearest of people to me. I greeted him with salaam,
but by Allaah he did not answer me. I said, ‘O Abu Qutaadah, I ask you by
Allaah, do you not know that I love Allaah and His Messenger?’ He remained
silent, so I repeated what I had said, pleading with him, but he remained silent.
I repeated it again, pleading with him, and he said, ‘Allaah and His Messenger
know best.’ My eyes filled with tears and I turned away and went and climbed
back over the wall…
When fifty nights had passed since the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings
of Allaah be upon him) had forbidden anyone to talk to us, after I had prayed
Fajr on the morning of the fiftieth day, and I was on the roof of our house,
whilst I was sitting as Allaah has described, with my own self constrained to
me and the earth, vast as it is, constrained to me [cf. Al-Tawbah 9:118], I heard
the sound of someone shouting from the mountain of Sal’ at the top of his
voice: ‘O Ka’b ibn Maalik, rejoice!’” (Fath, 4418).
We learn many great lessons from this story, which should not be ignored in
any way. We read about some of them in the scholars’ commentaries on this
story, as in Zaad al-Ma’aad and Fath al-Baari.
Another indication that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon
him) used this method was narrated by al-Tirmidhi from ‘Aa`ishah , who
said: “No behaviour was more hateful to the Messenger of Allaah (peace and
blessings of Allaah be upon him) than lying. If a man told lies in the presence
of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), he would remain
upset about it until he knew that he had repented from that.” (Abu ‘Eesa said:
this is a hasan hadeeth. Sunan al-Tirmidhi, no. 1973).
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The Prophet’s Methods for Correcting People’s Mistakes
According to a report narrated by Ahmad: “ … he would remain upset with
him…” (al-Musnad, 6152/)
According to another report: “If it happened that one of the members of his
household told a lie, he would keep turning away from him until he repented.”
(Reported by al-Haakim. Saheeh al-Jaami’, 4675).
It is clear from the reports mentioned above that turning away from the
person who is making a mistake until he gives it up is an effective educational
method, but in order for it to be effective, the person who is forsaking and
turning away from the other must have some status in the eyes of the latter,
otherwise it will not have a positive effect, and may even give the person
something to be happy about.
Praying against Someone who Stubbornly Persists in
Making a Mistake
Muslim (may Allaah have mercy on him) reported that a man ate with his left
hand in the presence of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon
him). He said,
“Eat with your right hand!” The man said, “I cannot” He said, “May you never
be able to!” Nothing was stopping him except pride, and he never raised it to
his mouth after that. (No. 2021).
According to a report narrated by Ahmad: “Iyaas ibn Salamah ibn al-Akwa’
reported that his father told him: ‘I heard the Messenger of Allaah (peace
and blessings of Allaah be upon him) telling a man called Bisr ibn Raa’i al-‘Eer,
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The Prophet’s Methods for Correcting People’s Mistakes
whom he saw eating with his left hand, to eat with his right hand. He said,
‘I cannot.’ He said, ‘May you never be able to!’ And his right hand never
reached his mouth after that.” (454/)
Al-Nawawi (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: “This hadeeth shows that
it is permissible to pray against the one who goes against a shar‘i ruling for
no good reason. It also demonstrates enjoining what is good and forbidding
what is evil in all matters, even in the matter of eating.” (Sharh Saheeh Muslim,
13192/).
We may also note here that the du’aa’ against him was not for something that
would help the Shaytaan against him, it was for something that was more like
a rebuke or telling-off.
Turning a Blind Eye to Some Mistakes out of Respect
And (remember) when the Prophet disclosed a matter in confidence to one
of his wives (Hafsah), so when she told it (to another, i.e., ‘Aa`ishah ), and
Allaah made it known to him, he informed part thereof and left a part. Then
when he told her (Hafsah) thereof, she said: ‘Who told you this?’ He said,
‘The All-Knower, the All-Aware (Allaah) has told me.’ ” [al-Tahreem 66:3 –
interpretation of the meaning]
Al-Qaasimi (may Allaah have mercy on him) said in Mahaasin al-Ta’weel:
“ ‘And remember when the Prophet’ refers to Muhammad (peace and blessings
of Allaah be upon him). ‘To one of his wives’ refers to Hafsah. ‘A matter in
confidence’ means that she was not allowed to disclose it, or what he forbade
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The Prophet’s Methods for Correcting People’s Mistakes
for himself although Allaah had allowed it. ‘When she told it’ means that she
told the secret to her companion (‘Aa`ishah ). ‘Allaah made it known to him’
means that Allaah told him what Hafsah had told ‘Aa`ishah . ‘He informed part
thereof’ means that he told her part of what she had divulged as a rebuke;
‘and left a part’ means that he did not say some of it, out of respect to her.”
It is noted in al-Ikleel: “The aayah indicates that there is nothing wrong with
speaking in a secretive way to one whom you trust such as a spouse or friend,
and that he or she is obliged to keep the secret. The aayah also indicates good
treatment of wives, gentleness when rebuking and refraining from seeking out
every fault.” (Mahaasin al-Ta’weel, 16222/)
Al-Hasan said: “No noble person will pick on every little fault.” Sufyaan said:
“Turning a blind eye is the action of noble people.”
Helping a Muslim to Correct his Mistake
Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) said:
“Whilst we were sitting with the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be
upon him), a man came to him and said, ‘O Messenger of Allaah, I am doomed!’
He said, ‘What is the matter with you?’ He said, ‘I had intercourse with my
wife whilst I was fasting.’ The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of
Allaah be upon him) said, ‘Are you able to set a slave free?’ He said, ‘No.’ He
asked, ‘Can you fast for two consecutive months?’ He said, ‘No.’ he said, ‘Can
you feed sixty poor persons?’ He said, ‘No.’ The Prophet (peace and blessings
of Allaah be upon him) said nothing more about the matter for a while, and
whilst we were sitting there like that, the Prophet (peace and blessings of
Allaah be upon him) was brought a large vessel full of dates. He said, ‘Where
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The Prophet’s Methods for Correcting People’s Mistakes
is the one who was asking just now?’ The man said, ‘Here I am.’ He said,
‘Take this and give it in charity.’ The man said, ‘O Messenger of Allaah, is there
anyone poorer between al-Harratayn [i.e., in Madeenah] than my family?’ The
Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) smiled so broadly that
his eyeteeth could be seen, then he said, ‘Feed it to your family.’” (Reported
by al-Bukhaari, no. 1936).
According to a report narrated by Ahmad from ‘Aa`ishah (may Allaah be
pleased with her), whilst the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of
Allaah be upon him) was sitting in the shade of a large tree, a man came to
him and said,
“I am burnt, O Messenger of Allaah!” He said, “What is the matter with you?”
He said, “I had intercourse with my wife whilst I was fasting.” ‘Aa`ishah said:
this was in Ramadaan. The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah
be upon him) said to him, “Sit down.” So he sat down at the edge of the group
of people. Then a man brought a donkey on which was a vessel of dates, and
said, “This is my sadaqah (charity), O Messenger of Allaah.” The Messenger of
Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said, “Where is the burnt
one who was here just now?” The man said, “Here I am, O Messenger of
Allaah.” He said, “Take this and give it in charity.” He said, “To whom should I
give it except myself? By the One Who sent you with the truth, I do not have
anything for myself and my children.” He said, “Then take it,” so he took it.
(al-Musnad, 6276/)
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The Prophet’s Methods for Correcting People’s Mistakes
Speaking Bluntly to the Person about the Mistake he is
Making
Al-Bukhaari (may Allaah have mercy on him) reported that Abu Dharr said:
“There was an argument between me and another man. His mother was a
non-Arab, and I said something insulting about her. He mentioned this to the
Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), who asked me,
‘Did you trade insults with so-and-so?’ I said, ‘Yes.’ He said, ‘Did you say
something insulting about his mother?’ I said, ‘Yes.’ He said, ‘You are a man
who still has something of jaahiliyyah in you.’ I said, ‘I said what I said because
I am getting old.’ He said, ‘Yes, but they are your brothers. Allaah has given
you power over them, but whoever is given power over someone, let him
feed him as he feeds himself, clothe him as he clothes himself, and not give
him more work to do than he is able. If he does give him too much work, let
him help him.’ ” (Fath, 6050)
In Saheeh Muslim it is reported that Abu Dharr (may Allaah be pleased with
him) said:
“I had an argument with one of my brothers. His mother was non-Arab, and
I said something insulting to him about his mother. He complained about me
to the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him). When
the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) met me, he said,
‘O Abu Dharr, you are a man who still has something of jaahiliyyah in him.’
I said, ‘O Messenger of Allaah, whoever insults a person, people will insult
his father and mother.’ He said, ‘O Abu Dharr, you are a man who still has
something of jaahiliyyah in him. They are your brothers[1], and Allaah has given
1 It seems as if the man was a dervant or a slave. (e)
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The Prophet’s Methods for Correcting People’s Mistakes
you power over them, so feed them as you feed yourself and clothe them as
you clothe yourself. Do not give them more work than they can do, and if
you give them too much to do, then help them.’ ” (Saheeh Muslim, no. 1661).
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) spoke in this
straightforward and open manner to Abu Dharr because he knew he would
accept it. Such a blunt approach can be a useful method that saves times and
energy, and gets the point across in the easiest manner, but it should only be
done when it is appropriate to the situation and the people involved.
This direct approach may be better not used if it will lead to something
worse or if it means that a greater interest will not be achieved, for example
if the person making the mistake is in a position of power and authority
and would not accept such frank comments, or if a direct approach would
cause too much embarrassment to the person who is doing wrong. It should
also not be used if the person is extra sensitive and is likely to react badly.
Undoubtedly a direct approach will be too much for a person to take if it is
made in a spirit of confrontation and with the aim of causing embarrassment
and showing him up at the time when his critic appears superior. Similarly
it is essential to be cautious about using “indirect” methods whose multiple
negative effects may outweigh the benefits of a direct approach, because they
may make the wrongdoer think that the one who is advising him thinks he is
stupid or that he is playing about, or because they may offend him because he
thinks he is making snide remarks. This way of pointing out what is right may
not be effective, because what is being said may not be clear to the person
addressed, so he will keep on making the mistake. Generally speaking, people
differ when it comes to accepting advice, and the right approach will differ in
each case, but a good attitude in discussing mistakes and guiding people will
also have the greatest effect in achieving the desired goal.
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The Prophet’s Methods for Correcting People’s Mistakes
Persuading a person that he is making a mistake
Engaging in a discussion with a wrongdoer with the aim of convincing him may
lead to the removal of the blinds over his eyes and bringing him back to the
Straight Path. An example of this is the report narrated by al-Tabaraani (may
Allaah have mercy on him) in al-Mu’jam al-Kabeer from Abu Umaamah (may
Allaah have mercy on him), who said that a young man came to the Messenger
of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and said,
“O Messenger of Allaah, give me permission to commit zinaa (fornication or
adultery).” The people shouted [at him] and [the Prophet (peace and blessings
of Allaah be upon him)] said, “Stop it!’ The Messenger of Allaah (peace and
blessings of Allaah be upon him) said, “Let him calm down. Come here.” He
came and sat in front of the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah
be upon him), who said to him, “Would you like it for your mother?” He said,
“No.” He said, “Likewise, people do not like it for their mothers. Would you
like it for your daughter?” He said, “No.” He said, “Likewise, people do not
like it for their daughters. Would you like it for your sister?” He said, “No.”
He said, “Likewise, people do not like it for their sisters. Would you like it for
your (paternal) aunt?” He said, “No.” He said, “Likewise, people do not like
it for their (paternal) aunts. Would you like it for your (maternal) aunt?” He
said, “No.” He said, “Likewise, people do not like it for their (maternal) aunts.”
Then the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him)
put his hand on his chest and said, “O Allaah, forgive his sins, purify his heart
and make him chaste.” (Al-Tabaraani, al-Mu’jam al-Kabeer, 7679 and 7759.
Additional material is included between square brackets).
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The Prophet’s Methods for Correcting People’s Mistakes
Making a person understand that his flimsy excuse is
not acceptable
Some people who make mistakes try to offer made-up, unacceptable excuses,
especially when they are caught red-handed. Indeed, some of them may appear
to be stammering when they give their flimsy excuses, especially those who
are not good at lying because they are basically good at heart. How should the
educator act when he comes across a situation like this? The following story
demonstrates the brilliant attitude of the Prophet (peace and blessings of
Allaah be upon him) when dealing with one of his Companions in a situation
of this nature. The story also shows us how the educator should persistently
follow up until the person gives up his wrong attitude.
Khuwwaat ibn Jubayr (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: “We made camp
with the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) at
Mar al-Zahraan (a place near Makkah). I came out of my tent and saw some
women talking amongst themselves. I liked them, so I went back, got out my
trunk and took out a hillah (a suit of clothes). I put it on and came and sat
with them. The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon
him) came out and said, ‘O Abu ‘Abd-Allaah!!” (i.e., he was reprimanding him
for sitting with those non-mahrem women). When I saw the Messenger of
Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), I got scared and started
stammering (trying to come up with an excuse). I said, “O Messenger of Allaah,
my camel got lost and I am looking for a rope to restrain it” (i.e., he came up
with a false excuse to justify what he had done). He left, and I followed him.
He threw his cloak at me and went in among some araak trees – and it is as
if I can see the whiteness of his back against the greenness of the araak trees.
He answered the call of nature and did wudoo’, and turned (to me) with the
water dripping from his beard onto his chest, and said: “O Abu ‘Abd-Allaah,
what happened to your lost camel?” Then we continued on our journey, and
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The Prophet’s Methods for Correcting People’s Mistakes
whenever he caught up with me, he would say, “Assalaamu aleika Abu ‘Abd-
Allaah. What happened to that lost camel?” When I realized this, I hastened
on to Madeenah and avoided the mosque and gatherings where the Prophet
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) was present. When this had gone
on for a long time, I tried to go to the mosque when no one else was around.
I went to the mosque and started to pray, but the Messenger of Allaah (peace
and blessings of Allaah be upon him) came out of one of his apartments and
started to pray two short rak’ahs. I made my prayer long, hoping that he
would go away and leave me. He said, ‘Make it as long as you like, O Abu ‘Abd-
Allaah, for I am not leaving until you finish.’ I said to myself, ‘By Allaah, I should
apologize to the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon
him) and make him happy.’ When I had finished, he said, ‘Al-salaamu ‘alayka,
O Abu ‘Abd-Allaah. What happened to your lost camel?’ I said, ‘By the One
Who sent you with the truth, that camel has never gotten lost since the time
I became a Muslim.’ He said, ‘May Allaah have mercy on you’ three times, then
he never mentioned it again.” (Al-Haythami said: al-Tabaraani reported it with
two isnaads. The men of one of them are all saheeh apart from al-Jarraah ibn
Mukhallad, who is thiqah. Al-Majma’, 9401/. Upon referring to al-Mu’jam al-
Kabeer by al-Tabaraani, 4203/, it becomes clear that the report from Zayd ibn
Aslam is talking about Khuwwaat ibn Jubayr, who said, ‘We made camp …’ In
the biography of Khuwwaat (may Allaah be pleased with him) in al-Tahdheeb
it says: Zayd ibn Aslam reported mursal from him. In al-Isaabah it says that
Khuwwaat died in 40 or 42 AH, and in al-Siyar it says that Zayd ibn Aslam died
in 136 AH; on this basis there is a break in the isnaad).
This is a brilliant study in training and the use of wise strategies to achieve the
desired result. We may also learn the following points from this story:
1. A person who has committed a sin will feel shy of a respected leader when
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The Prophet’s Methods for Correcting People’s Mistakes
he catches him out.
2. The way the educator looks at and questions a person – even though it may
be very brief – will have a great impact on him.
3. Not discussing a false excuse at the time of hearing it – even though it
is clearly made up – and turning away from the person may be enough to
make him realize that his excuse is not acceptable, which will motivate him to
repent and apologize. This is what we understand from the phrase “he left.”
4. The good educator is the one who makes the person who has made a
mistake feel too shy of him, so that he tries to hide away from him, but at the
same time, his need for him makes him want to come to him. Then the latter
takes precedence over the former.
5. The change of attitude towards the wrongdoer is based – in this case – on
the wrongdoer’s admission that he was wrong and his giving up the thing he
had done.
If the educator or leader is held in high esteem by his companions, then if
he rebukes one of them or tells him that he has made a mistake, this will
have an effect on him. The leader should pay attention to the interests of
others when rebuking one of his companions, so that all may benefit from it.
However, this should not mean that he should ignore any negative effect on
that particular individual. That can be dealt with and its effects limited in many
ways, even though a third party, as al-Mugheerah did when he asked ‘Umar to
be a mediator whilst at the same time explaining the situation and affirming
how highly the leader thinks of the follower.
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The Prophet’s Methods for Correcting People’s Mistakes
Paying attention to things that are inherent in human
nature
An example of this is the jealousy of women, especially in the case of co-wives,
some of whom may make mistakes that, if they were made by anyone else
under normal circumstances, would be treated quite differently. The Prophet
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) used to pay special attention to
the issue of jealousy among his wives and the mistakes that were made by
them as a result, and the patience, justice and fairness with which he handled
the matter are plain to see. An example of this is the report narrated by al-
Bukhaari (may Allaah have mercy on him) in his Saheeh from Anas, who said:
“The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) was with one of
his wives when another of the Mothers of the Believers sent a big vessel full
of food to him. The wife in whose house the Prophet (peace and blessings
of Allaah be upon him) was present struck the hand of the servant, and the
vessel fell and broke in two. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be
upon him) picked up the pieces and put them together, then he gathered up
the food that had been in the vessel and said, ‘Your mother is jealous.’ Then
he asked the servant to wait until he was given the vessel belonging to the
wife in whose house he was, and he sent the whole vessel to the wife whose
vessel had been broken, and kept the broken vessel in the house of the one
who had broken it.” (Fath, 5225)
According to a report narrated by al-Nisaa`i (Kitaab ‘Ishrat al-Nisaa’), Umm
Salamah brought some food in a vessel belonging to her to the Messenger of
Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and his companions, then
‘Aa`ishah came wrapped in a garment, carrying a stone, which she threw and
broke the vessel. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) put
the two halves back together and said,
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The Prophet’s Methods for Correcting People’s Mistakes
“Eat, your mother is jealous…”
…twice, then he took ‘Aa`ishah’s vessel and sent it to Umm Salamah, and gave
Umm Salamah’s vessel to ‘Aa`ishah.
According to a report narrated by al-Daarimi (Kitaab al-Buyoo’, Baab man
kasara shay’an fa ‘alayhi mithluhu) from Anas, he said:
“One of the wives of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him)
sent him a vessel in which was some thareed [a dish of sopped bread, meat
and broth], when he was in the house of one of his other wives, who struck
the vessel and broke it. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon
him) started to pick up the thareed and put it back into the vessel, saying, ‘Eat,
your mother is jealous…’ ”
Women’s jealousy is an inherent part of their nature, that may cause them
to do bad things and prevent them from seeing the consequences of their
actions. It was said that when a woman is jealous, she cannot see the bottom
of a valley from its top.
Conclusion
Following this exploration of the Sunnah and the methods which the Prophet
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) used in dealing with people’s
mistakes, we should conclude by mentioning the following points:
1. Correcting mistakes is obligatory and very important. It is part of naseehah
(giving sincere advice) and forbidding what is evil, but it should be remembered
that Islam is not only about forbidding what is evil; we are also commanded
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The Prophet’s Methods for Correcting People’s Mistakes
to enjoin what is good.
2. Education and training are not merely the matter of correcting mistakes;
they also involve teaching and showing the basic principles of religion and
the rules of sharee’ah, and using various methods to establish these concepts
firmly in people’s minds and hearts, by example, by exhorting them, by telling
stories, by discussing incidents, etc. From this it is clear that some parents
and teachers are falling short by confining their efforts only to addressing
mistakes without paying due attention to teaching the basics or dealing with
mistakes before they happen by instilling that which will protect people from
committing mistakes in the first place, or at least reduce their impact.
3. It is clear from the incidents and stories mentioned above that the Prophet
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) used different approaches in
dealing with different mistakes. This is because circumstances and personalities
vary. Whoever understands this and wants to follow suit must compare the
situation he is dealing with, with these examples to find the one that most
closely resembles it, so that he can determine the most appropriate approach
to use.
We ask Allaah, may He be glorified and exalted, to guide us and protect us,
to make us openers of good and closers of evil, and to guide others through
us, for He is the All-Hearing, the Ever-Near, Who answers prayers. He is
the Best of supporters and the Best of helpers, and He is the Guide to the
Straight Path. May Allaah bless the Unlettered Prophet and all his family and
companions. Praise be to Allaah, the Lord of the Worlds.
